What is Tantra and why it will change your life
If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve heard the term Tantra mentioned in relation to sacred sexuality practices and probably have some vague idea as to what it might entail. Perhaps images of silk and incense come to mind, or slow, sensual massages with ritualized acts. While this may be part of the experience, Tantra is about so much more.
When we ask the question, “What is Tantra?”, everyone seems to have a slightly different answer. Tantra has a long and rich history going back to ancient India and Tibet, with many different scholarly texts and styles of practice. But without getting into a history lesson, let’s explore what it actually means to practice tantra.
What is Tantra?
Tantra is a broad spiritual path, a fundamental approach to life. It is about embracing each moment and allowing life to move through you fully. Unlike conventional spiritual paths, tantra makes no distinction between good and bad, sacred and profane. Everything in existence is part of divine creation and can therefore be used as an access point to spiritual awakening. Tantra invites us to slow down and be present, to savour, feel, and express, and in doing so, to make love with life.
Tantra inherently celebrates the erotic, and that is why we have come to associate it with sacred sexual practices.
What are the benefits of practicing Tantra?
Since Tantra sees all experience as inherently sacred, it naturally celebrates the erotic energy that moves through all of us. By bringing presence and reverence to each and every facet of our lives, we build our capacity for intimacy, pleasure and wholeness.
Heal body shame
In a culture where we’re inundated with filtered and edited images, it’s hard to stay grounded in a true understanding of what real bodies look like. The more we imbibe these images, the more we shift toward an externalized perspective of ourselves, often distorted and full of negative judgments.
Tantric practices remind us of our inherent divinity and worth. In the world of tantra there are no “bad” bodies. We learn to feel ourselves from the inside again, to remain grounded in a deep sense of inner wisdom and connection, and to feel our sensuality emanating from within.
Heal sexual trauma
Sexual trauma is a staggeringly common experience, and one that can cause a ripple of suffering for years to come. When our systems are overwhelmed in a threatening situation and we are unable to take effective action (ie. fight or flee), the energy of the trauma becomes lodged in the body. This can cause our sexual energy to become frozen and shut down, or prevent us from noticing danger until it is too late.
Beginning with a solo tantra practice provides a gentle way to begin communicating with the body and weaving an intention of healing. Because Tantra holds space for all emotions, we strengthen our capacity to release grief and anger as much as we grow our capacity for joy. Genital massage (which can include yoni massage/lingam massage or anal massage) can be a powerful tool tap into stored emotions and begin inviting flow through breath, sound and movement.
Cultivate true intimacy
Intimacy and vulnerability are two sides of the same coin. The level of depth we can experience with ourselves or a partner rests on our ability to meet everything before us from a space of compassion and curiosity. In many Tantric practices, we are invited to soften our bodies, breathe, feel, and meet ourselves and our lover with fresh eyes.
Through dropping our assumptions and stories, we are free to experience each moment as it unfolds and delight in its surprises. Through our own softening, we open ourselves to be seen more deeply, and lovingly witnessed in all of our messiness and glory.
Expand pleasure capacity
How often do we rush through sex, or even our own self pleasure practice? In a culture of productivity, pleasure can be seen as a frivolous indulgence that often gets overlooked. But pleasure can actually be a source of healing and incredibly restorative for the nervous system!
Tantra teach us to go slow and to savour. When we take the time to focus on pleasure, we begin to subtly rewire our brain and nervous system to be more receptive to what feels good. As the nervous system grows in this capacity, we expand our ability to hold sexual energy and raise our threshold for pleasure. This translates into more joy, more receptivity, and higher highs during our erotic experiences.
Awaken spiritual connection
Sex, like any other experience, can be an access point to heightened spiritual consciousness. The key factor is the level of awareness we bring into our practice. Through practicing tantra, we come to recognize mind, body and spirit as one continuum, all manifestations of the same source. When we use tantra to break through the illusion of separateness, we come to recognize ourselves as divine source and pure love. From this realization we find abundance, joy, and the ability to meet life with playfulness and whole-hearted engagement without clinging.
If you’ve been practicing Tantra for a while, I’m curious to hear some of the benefits you’ve noticed. Leave a comment in the comments section below!
As always, if you’d like to connect further to discuss how we can incorporate some of these practices into your own life, I invite you to book a free 20-minute introductory call with me.
xo
Monica